I happen to know, really well, two women who
left their husbands to run off with their high school sweeties. Let’s hear
it for Classmates.com.
 Apparently, the internet
really is a great way to reach out and eventually get to touch someone.
I was incredulous the first
time I heard a story like that, taken aback by the second one, and now I’m
just sitting around wondering who’ll be next.
That both of my friends who
linked up (no pun intended) with their former beaus were straight probably
gave me a false sense of vicariousness to this phenomenon.
Then, one day, I was
leafing through Damron’s Women’s Traveller guide, looking for New York
accommodations, when I came across a B&B in the Chelsea section of the
city. It had a website and I surfed over to it.
What follows, is the e-mail
exchange in its entirety. Only some names have been changed to protect the
clueless.
Hello,
I was browsing DAMRON
looking for NYC accommodations when I came across (name of inn). I checked
out your web site and got a surprise because I recognized the innkeeper’s
name (he who shall remain nameless).
Are you the (first name)
who was my senior prom date in 1965? Rhodes School, Waldorf Astoria and then
a post prom ride to Bear Mountain state park????
If so, we should have known
we were both gay. Nobody else hates camping and likes Broadway THAT much.
I live in Rehoboth Beach (Gayberry
RFD) with my partner of 21 years (Bonnie) and will definitely have to check
out (name of inn) when we head for New York! If you have Damron’s Women,
our photos are in the CAMP Rehoboth ad under Rehoboth Beach. We’re the two
with dark hair on the right, front.
Cheers,
Fay (Rubenstein) Jacobs
Dear Fay:
Okay, I’m stunned (and my
office staff is driving me crazy, insisting that you became a lesbian after
you dated me!) and here’s what I remember:
We were introduced by our
mutual friend (name omitted to protect the yente), while you were both
attending the Rhodes school (your family had class, she was just
pretentious), and your other best friend was Mary Ellen (who starred in
Sound of Music on Broadway) and you starred in Outward Bound in high school
(you were pretty good, but what a bad play!), and we used to make out
furiously in your parents’ living room while they were out (Robert Goulet
and Carol Lawrence lived in your W. 54th St. building, and so did the
drunken Elaine Stritch, talk about your lesbian) and I hoped you’d never
want to go further (which you didn’t for a while), and we went to the Top
of the Sixes for your prom, and you had a Corvette which you were still too
young to drive, and our trip to Bear Mountain, and your visit to my home in
Brooklyn (and making out in my parents’ bed, which really freaked me out),
and my telling you that we could never marry because my mother had the same
name (!!!), and your going away to be drama counselor at summer camp and
coming back and wanting to have more serious sex (God help me), which
probably was the final wedge in our relationship. I still have photos of us
dressed for your prom tucked away in my memory box (pretty scary). How’s
that for recall????
And it’s been 36 years
since we last spoke!! And how cool to hear from you; I don’t know if I
have the Damron’s Women’s Guide, but I’ll check to see you. And it
would be great if you and your lover would come to NYC and stay here; I’ll
make you a great deal. Much more to tell you, but time for dinner, and hope
you’ll write again and tell me how you got here from there over the last
35 (!!!) years..
Love, (He who shall remain nameless)
Dear (He who shall remain
nameless)
Oy! Where to start!!!!!
First off, every man I ever
dated (except the man I married, which is a whole other embarrassing story)
turned out to be gay, so it had to be me that was the culprit, okay?
I’m glad you remember it
was (Blankety-Blank) who introduced us, cause I lost that bit of info to the
ages. I have no idea what happened to her, but you’re right, she was
pretentious.
As for Drama Club (I’ve
heard it called Gay Head Start, you know), you were right about Outward
Bound being a perfectly awful play. However, you were being too polite about
my performance, as I’m a dreadful actress and you knew it even then.
That’s why I became a director. I foolishly tried to make my living that
way for a while, but I have come to my senses.
Now to some appalling
ancient miscommunication: Yes, we used to make out in my parents living
room, where Goulet & Lawrence lived next door and Elaine Stritch
dieseled to and fro. But, silly boy, it was I who prayed we’d never go
farther than kissing; I was petrified and bizarrely disinterested. We sure
could have saved ourselves years of angst if we’d just discussed it then.
And yes, I remember Top of
the Sixes Restaurant, and Bear Mountain prom night. I actually do have the
photos, 36 years later. However, I’ve totally repressed the Brooklyn
make-out session in your parents bed (gawwwd!!!) and, contrary to your
tragic misinterpretation, all I wanted to do when I got back from summer
camp was go to more Broadway shows with you. So you had it all wrong!
What have I been up to? In
college I majored in theatre and communications, watched all my friends get
married, figured it was mandatory, married a freakin’ professional
accordion player (stop laughing), got divorced six endless years later, met
my partner Bonnie 21 years ago, and then four years ago we chucked
everything to move to Rehoboth Beach. I work in tourism & PR, and write
a column for our local gay publication. You can check me out at
www.camprehoboth.com.
By the way, that old
Corvette croaked in 1973. I now drive the official lesbian car, the Subaru
Outback.
We’d love to come to NYC
and stay at your place some time. What a hoot that would be. Thanks so much
for writing, even with those seriously skewed memories. With all the stories
you hear about people reconnecting through the internet and running off with
their high school sweethearts, we can both rest assured it won’t happen
here.
Cheers,
Fay
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