CAMP Safe:  Safe is Sexy

Revelation in Wal-mart

Fourth of July was an awesome weekend for the CAMPsafe program. It was great to see so many people out having a good time at the beach, bars and the Retro Party and Love. We had many people stop by our CAMPsafe table and take some of our CAMPsafe materials. From the numbers of condoms and lube that we passed out it looks like a whole lot of guys had a lot of fun being safe and sexy. Thanks for asking for the condoms and thanks for using them. We have lots more where they came from!

Recently, we chatted about how being safe can be sexy if you just make it a priority in your life. One’s decision to play safe can make the world of difference in so many things. Use condoms, insist that your partners use them, use them correctly but just use them. Remember being safe with your partners is the best way to show that you care. If you are sexually active, it is the best way to protect yourself and the ones you love.

This past week, I made my monthly pilgrimage to the goddess WalMartia. As I was walking in the store, I noticed a very tall African American woman with a giant blond wig on at the customer service counter. She was drop dead gorgeous and my eyes zoomed on her—very quickly. As I checked her out, I noticed that she was a he. WOW! Way to go, girl! Wal-Mart and Rehoboth, a very unique match.

I ran around the store and did my shopping and then headed quickly to the checkout. When I got there I noticed four male Wal-Mart employees laughing at something. I looked to see what it was and when I heard some of their comments, I knew what they were laughing at. I felt sick to my stomach. The man dressed as a woman was being ridiculed. It reminded me of some of my own experiences being ridiculed for being gay. We have all experienced it. I begin to think about what I was seeing. I thought about the courage she has to go out and be herself. I believe that she had incredible self-esteem to come out as a woman to shop at Wal-Mart.

Each and every gay man and woman has had to do some amazing personal work to figure out where they belong in the world. Often this work was done in silence and alone but each of us has turned out to be a fairly incredible person. This "work" we have done figuring out who we are and where we fit in can leave us with very healthy self-esteem, full of pride, joy, and self-fulfillment or it can leave us feeling damaged, unloved and worthless.

You see the exact same experiences can leave us both fulfilled and feeling worthless at the same time. Make it your business to choose the perspective that emphasizes the good things in you. We all have skeletons in our closets. We aren’t all out to everybody. Some of us feel grossly inadequate around some friends, acquaintances and even family. We all need to continue to work on ourselves and always continue to grow. Look for the good in yourself and in your friends and family. You have already grown more personally than the majority of the American public ever will. Give yourself the credit you deserve. Emphasize and cultivate the positive things about your self-esteem. Hold your head up with the greatest sense of pride in yourself and your personal accomplishments.

So why is safer sex Sal talking about self-esteem? Moments of low self-esteem tempt us to make bad sexual choices. Many times these choices aren’t something we would normally do. Many guys I have talked with say to me, "what was I thinking" and "why did I do that?" It is simple. A man who feels good about himself and where he has been and where he is going...a person with a healthy self esteem…is more likely to make decisions to protect his physical safety. A man with a healthy self-esteem is going to make wise sexual choices. Be healthy. Be sexy. Be safe. Just do it! Safe is sexy! And so is good self-esteem.

P.S. The "condom fairy" needs help handing out condoms to all the sexy men who visit Rehoboth. Our next condom stuffing is Tuesday, July 15. Call 302-227-5620 for more details.