CAMP Safe  

Did you know that there is a name for the generation of men who are now in their forties and fifties—the men who lived through the first waves of the AIDS epidemic and lost so many of their friends, collogues and lovers? They are called the lost generation because we lost so many of them. We lost their humor, their smiles, their creativity and their contribution to society. I often wonder how things would be different today had these brave men lived, been able to continue to contribute to society and affect the course of our lives. It might be a very different world!

Those of you who know me know I don’t live in the past. I believe in the future, its possibilities and all of the options it offers us. That’s why I’m writing this article today. I am afraid we are going to lose another generation and all of its hopes, joys and contributions. Over the past few weeks, I have been struck by the number of young men from our community who are confessing to me that they are having bareback intercourse.

So what’s the problem? We’ve all done it. But there is a big risk involved here. A friend just returned from a trip to London and Paris and he brought me some wonderful literature. Did you know that different studies have placed the risk ratios for having unprotected sex at anywhere from 1 in 1000 to 1 in 120 or as high as 1 in 30? Those numbers are all very different and they are studying the same thing. In actuality, the numbers can be as high as 1 in1 or 1 in 2! That means that some men get infected by having unprotected sex the first or second time! Those are odds I am unwilling to take, though lots of people seem to take them every day and thousands are infected each year! So what’s new? You’ve heard this from me a thousand times. What can I tell you to make you pay attention? I can tell you that if you use a condom properly, and it doesn’t break or slip off, the odds are that you cannot contract HIV even if your partner is positive.

The young men that I’ve been talking to who say they are willing to take those terrible risks believe they can beat the odds, and that even if they become positive that it won’t be so bad. They tell me there are meds that work, and work for a long time. This is somewhat true but the meds can cost in excess of $3,000 a month. Insurance will become very difficult to get and options suddenly become much less. You see, if you are positive, you will have to wear a condom every time you have sex even if it is with another positive man because of cross infection problems. When you disclose your status to many prospective partners, they will be unwilling to take the risk with you of having a condom break or slip off. You will have a difficult time securing insurance to cover the expensive meds and treatments. Horrible diarrhea and other problems are associated with the medication, as well. So my question to these men is "is a single encounter worth this kind of risk?" Becoming positive is not the end of the world, and it is not the certain death sentence that it was before protease inhibitors became available. But why risk it if it is so easily preventable?

I don’t want us to lose another gifted, talented person of any generation. Keep your options open—the world needs your contributions. Be safe. Make wise choices.