CAMP Profile

When the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) went looking for long-time couples to feature in a series of newspaper ads, their eyes settled on Roni Posner and Jeri Berc. The women, who split their time between a home on Capitol Hill in Washington, DC and a house in downtown Lewes, have been a couple for the past 17 years and had the courage to have a real Jewish wedding in 1988—years before gay marriage was on almost anyone’s radar.

The ad campaign HRC was arranging would be a companion piece to the Canadian marriage decision, the expected decision in Massachusetts (still to come), and the backlash against gay marriage prompting talk of a constitutional amendment banning it. HRC sought out "everyman" and "everywoman" couples to use in an ad showing how there are 1,400 ways gay couples remain uncovered by the benefits of civil marriage. When HRC saw a photo of Roni and Jeri taken for another purpose, the staff asked photographer Judy Rolfe to take their portrait for possible inclusion in the HRC ads. Rolfe, who also has a local connection, and has exhibited at the Rehoboth Art League, arranged the photo shoot.

No casual photo session, Rolfe spent three and a half hours taking portraits of the pair at their home, in their kitchen with their two standard Poodles, opening mail at their home, and outside near DC’s Federal Judiciary Building.

"It was a wonderful day," says Roni, who admits that being selected as potential "everywomen" was an honor.

"Growing up on Long Island, it was a thrill for me to think that we might be selected to be in a full page ad in the NY Times. What a victory that would be," say Jeri. It remains to be seen whether the portrait of Jeri and Roni will make the final cut for the ad, but in the meantime, they were thrilled to have been included.

The couple met through mutual friends in the mid-1980s, where both were involved in Washington DC’s gay synagogue. They both insist it was love at first sight. And, once that was established, it was clear that they were two individuals with exactly the same goal, too.

"We wanted to be married. A real marriage, with a traditional wedding ceremony and gifts of cut crystal candy dishes," says Roni, "and neither of us was willing to settle for less than what we really, really wanted."

They got engaged on Valentine’s Day 1987. Knowing what they wanted was the easy part. Achieving it took a lot of chutzpah. At the time of their engagement, the synagogue had never conducted a gay wedding. It would be years before commitment ceremonies became fashionable, and more than fifteen years before gay marriage hit the newspapers and TV screens. Undeterred, they worked with the synagogue and put together what they call a very traditional wedding. Members of both families were on hand, (Jeri’s gay brother gave her away, while Roni’s gay sister was in the wedding) the religious ceremony mirrored a traditional Jewish wedding and both women considered themselves wed from that day forward.

Having been such trailblazers, the two over-achievers with PhDs and high-power professional careers (Roni works with an association for non-profits and Jeri works for the federal government) can hardly be called "everywoman." But they really are good role models for raising awareness of the protections gay men and lesbians are missing when it comes to marriage. Between spousal health insurance, fairness in matters of inheritance and social security and other missing benefits, gay and lesbian Americans are on the short end of the benefits stick. Hopefully, HRC’s ad campaign and the work it does for equality can help change perceptions and the laws.

In the meantime, Roni and Jeri, both age 55, consider themselves blessed to be able to lead the life they live, find balance between work and play, tend their gardens, travel, and enjoy their life at the shore. Their historic Lewes home overlooks a two-lot garden, with a bubbling brook, where Jeri spends a lot of her time.

Like so many others who have made this area their home—or second home—Roni and Jeri love the freedom they have to be themselves in their community.

To that end, Roni worked with CAMP Rehoboth last winter to produce the Starburst Gayla, a women’s New Year’s Eve party at the Rehoboth Convention Center—a hugely successful event which is on the schedule again for this year. Proceeds from the event go to CAMP Rehoboth and WomenHeart, a non-profit organization and the nation’s only patient advocacy organization representing the 8,000,000 American women living with heart disease. WomenHeart promotes early detection, accurate diagnosis and proper treatment for all women through its support, information and advocacy programs— and it will be a recipient of proceeds once again this New Year’s Eve.

Roni and Jeri, their friends and associates, along with a committee of CAMP volunteers are already making plans for a successful Second Annual Starburst Gayla.

"I had to be closeted in my profession and even with my parents. For me, being here is like a new day—to be living the truth and working hard for social change," says Roni.