Pride and Prejudice
In the United States the month of June is often the time when we celebrate Pride events, primarily because the Stonewall riots occurred in the early morning hours of June 28, 1969. Stonewall is generally considered to be the first time gay people rose up and really fought back against the extreme anti-gay legal system so prevalent in the 1950s and ‘60s in this country.
According to Wikipedia, on only four previous occasions has a U.S. President officially declared Pride month: on June 2, 2000, President Bill Clinton declared June “Gay and Lesbian Pride Month; then in 2009, 2010, and 2011 President Barack Obama declared June “Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month.”
Much has changed in the 40 plus years since Stonewall. Around the world gay people have learned to celebrate who we are and to understand that gay is good—and we’ve been joined by countless straight allies, friends, and family members. Attitudes have changed, people have changed. All over the world there are people committed to supporting equality for everyone.
Perhaps that’s why North Carolina pastor Charles Worley’s homophobic sermon on May 13 sounds so bizarre; somehow shocking and absurd all at the same time. On the one hand, Worley’s video is horrifying, on the other, comic—almost a Saturday Night Live parody of a conservative preacher.
Worley’s comments came four days after Obama’s support of same-sex marriage.
In the YouTube video of the sermon, Worley says, “Build a great, big, large fence, 150- or 100-mile long, put all the lesbians in there, fly over and drop some food. Do the same thing with the queers and the homosexuals, and have that fence electrified so they can’t get out,” he says. “Feed ‘em, and you know what? In a few years they’ll die. Do you know why? They can’t reproduce.”
Talk like this is hateful, sure, but at the same time it is so extreme that, rather than convincing others to believe as he does, it offers our society a prism through which to view the broader spectrum of its own attitudes and beliefs. As gay people become more and more accepted by the larger culture around us, our opponents have to become louder and more outrageous in their accusations just to be heard. Like Fred Phelps and his crew, Worley and his kind may be doing us a favor in the long run.
Looking back on my own life, I was in high school when drag queens in NYC put down their spike heels and took to the streets of Greenwich Village. My life as an out, gay man started shortly after Stonewall, and it has always been a part of my gay experience. Over the years that I have lived in or visited New York, I’ve walked past that historic gay landmark on countless occasions. Just a couple of weeks ago, I pointed it out to a nephew of mine as we visited the city. It still stands as a symbol of gay freedom after all these years.
At the heart of gay pride there is an act of affirmation. Coming out is about accepting who we are—who we were meant to be. It’s about learning to love ourselves so we can, in turn, learn to love others. Charles Worley and all the others like him do not have the power to make us crawl back into the closet, or to hurt us in any way.
We all have our own views when it comes to religious beliefs, and I am sometimes hesitant to talk about mine in these pages out of respect for the diversity around us, but for me, the day I understood with every fiber of my being that God loves me just as I am, changed everything about my life and my relationship to everyone else around me. That’s the feeling that lives in the core of the pride philosophy.
Coming out is a continual process, and it’s about more than just saying we’re gay. It’s about accepting every part of who we are as human beings. It involves peeling back the layers of our heart one at a time, until, like a rose, we are fully open and visible to one another.
There was a time several years ago when I questioned the need for gay pride. Surely, I reasoned, we had moved past the need for it. Now, I’ve changed my mind. Our pride is not the pride of arrogance, but a deep affirmation of who we are—and an examination of who we are meant to be and the role we are called to play within the society around us.
In the years ahead, the gay movement will find both more success and more failure. Like the tides, our cause will ebb and flow within the current of public opinion and politics. We will continue to make progress, no doubt, but whether the days ahead are good ones or bad ones, words will not change who we are.
We started CAMP Rehoboth to provide positive affirmation for all of us. It has given us a “house with a heart” and a safe and welcoming place for all. Happy Pride Month!
Murray Archibald, CAMP Co-founder and President of the Board of Directors of CAMP Rehoboth, is an artist in Rehoboth Beach. Photo: Poodle Beach, Memorial Day 2012.
A Note to Founders about the Black and White Beach Ball
I’ve had a few questions this week about why Founders’ Circle donors did not receive free tickets to the new Black and White Beach Ball. Let me explain.
The Founders’ Circle was a capital campaign created to raise money for the construction of the new wing of the CAMP Rehoboth Community Center. The Founders’ Circle capital campaign came to a close several years ago with the completion of the spectacular Founders’ Circle wall and the new building.
Originally, the Black and White Beach Ball was a Founder’s Circle event, but with the ending of the Founders’ Circle, we moved the HeART of the Community Art Auction to other events and ended the Ball as well.
The new Black and White Ball is no longer associated with the Founders’ Circle.
We will be celebrating the incredible gifts of our Founders Circle at an event at CAMP Rehoboth later this year. Watch for details.
As always, we are deeply grateful to the Founders’ Circle, to all our members, our donors, and our sponsors. —MA