LETTERS From CAMP Rehoboth |
Student CAMP: What's Out There? |
by Kristen Foery |
Its official. Im going to change the motto of Rehoboth from "The Nations Summer Capital" to "Parking? Forget about it." No bitterness there Anyway, with Memorial Day past us, summer is now in full swing. I am almost (thank God) out of school. This I greet with mixed emotions, because while it means that I dont have to put up with math class anymore, I also wont get to see Megan (same girl, different pseudonym) as often. With the advent of such wonderful things as the Henlopen Theater Project and the new movie theater, there are many more neat things to do in the summer than there were before. (Theres always the obvious "go to the beach," but thats so common.) Despite the fact that there are many things to do here in the summer, there are virtually none that are specifically designed for gay teenagers. I have decided, therefore, to compile a list of resources, to aid the bored gay teenagers that might be lost as to what to do around here. First, the online resources: (Hey, you were expecting?) www.youth-guard.org is the non profit that I work for. We do email lists. Theyre very amusing, if nothing else. www.oasismag.com is the address for Oasis Magazine, the largest gay teen ezine on the web. (Also one of the only ones can we say niche market?) www.elight.com is another wonderful ezine, complete with personals. For those in the D.C. area, the Sexual Minority Youth Assistance League (SMYAL) can be found at www.smyal.org. There are many others, and the best way to find them is to either follow the links of the above pages, or go to a search engine such as Dogpile ( www.dogpile.com ) and type in "gay teenagers." And, since we are 8 times more likely to be suicidal, the site for the Trevor Project, a gay teen suicide prevention program, is at www.trevorproject.com. 800-850-8078 is their hotline- free, 24/7, and especially trained for gay teens. Dont forget to erase your tracks, if you have to. Delete the caches and erase histories. Its very easy to do if you just poke around a little bit. There are also many very interesting books that are targeted at gay teens. Annie On My Mind, by Nancy Garden, is one of my personal favorites. There are many other fine titles such as Girl Goddess #9, Patience and Sarah, Am I Blue?, and Letters from a Hot Pink Notebook. Many of these can be found at Lambda Rising, which has a small but very nice youth section. I would like to write my own book about coming out. Maybe some day. Im afraid that it would basically be a large amount of pathos and angst. Such is the way with teenagers. One of my friends asked me the other day for advice on coming out. I thought about it and thought about it, and I finally wrote the following in response:The question posed: How can I tell my parents Im gay?There are many ways to tell ones parents that one is gay. The first: "Hey, Mom, Dad. Im gay." But no! Were teenagers! Things cannot be that simple!Theres the Kristen Foery method of telling ones mother, which involves screaming "YES I AM, WHAT THE HELLS YOUR POINT???" when asked. This is a very bad idea. Then theres the Kristen Foery method of telling ones father, which involves making it blatantly obvious, over a period of roughly four or five years, that one is a raging screaming queer, but denying it when asked, and then, in what can only be called a burst of extreme anti-climax, telling everything, only to be confronted with, "Yes, honey, I know." This is a very frustrating method. But lo! There are many ways! Theres the "make subtle hints until youre blue in the face" method! "Hey, mom..." "Yes, honey?" "Would you still love me if I was... um... different?" "So dad..." "Yeah?" "er... so, what do you think of Ellen Degeneres?" Another method is the let them catch you making out with your girl/boyfriend method. "Honey, I brought you some AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!" This is a good way to kill off said parent. The "flame on" method is another popular one. "Mom, lets rent a Streisand movie! Faabulous!" These are just a few popular methods. Others include the "drenching yourself in rainbows method," the "I know this is the third time this week, but cant <insert s.o. name> stay the night again?" method, the "coming out at a major family holiday method" (also known as pass the gravy Im gay" method) and the ever popular "tell them you have to talk to them in such a serious tone that they freak out and think youre pregnant/have gotten someone pregnant and will be relieved when you say that youre just gay" method. Method not recommended:The cry your eyes out in a sobfest method.Why? Because no matter what, that is the way it usually ends. Coming out is a very difficult thing.But well worth it, I think. Kristen Foery, Governor-Elect of the Delaware State Youth Congress, is a regular contributor to LETTERS From CAMP Rehoboth. She can be reached in care of LETTERS from CAMP Rehoboth, or at kristen@youth-guard.org. |
LETTERS From CAMP Rehoboth, Vol. 9, No. 6, June 4, 1999 |