We Are Fam-i-ly (A Tribe of Our Own)

Last week at the CAMP Rehoboth Volunteer Appreciation Party I used the expression “CAMP family” to talk about the volunteers who make up our organization. Volunteers are a vital part of the CAMP Rehoboth family—so are our members.

Currently, we are in the middle of our CAMP Rehoboth Spring Membership Campaign and I’ve been thinking about what it means to belong to something, and why it matters to us as human beings.

Opponents of gay rights are often a part of organizations that use the word “family,” either in their name or their message, to exclude those who do not fit into a one-man-one-woman-kind-of-world. A quick visit to the website of the Family Research Council, or Focus on the Family is a harsh reminder that there are people and organizations actively working against us. 

Over the years, almost everyone who has ever heard my partner Steve Elkins talk about the founding of CAMP Rehoboth will have heard him say that “we started CAMP Rehoboth back when there was a bumper sticker that read, “keep Rehoboth a family town.” He always goes on to say, “and we wanted it to be a family town too—but families come in all sizes, shapes, and orientations.” (Just for the record, I just searched the CAMP Rehoboth website for the phrase “keep Rehoboth a family town” and my name, and was surprised at how many times I’ve mentioned it, as well, over the years—including in this column just last spring.)

My point is that the word “family” is important to us. It has been used to bash us; it is used by us to celebrate who we are. “We Are Family” will always be one of the great gay anthems. Remember the scene in The Birdcage? The ultraconservative political figure and his family have to be smuggled out of the nightclub in full drag—and they’re all singing, “We are fam-i-ly! 

LGBT people know what it is like to be excluded, and that exclusion has, I believe, made us more accepting of diversity. We’ve always had to expand the definition of family to include those who have been cast out of their own. 

When I spoke the word “CAMP family” last week, it resonated with me. We’ve used it before, primarily in reference to CAMP Families, a CAMP Rehoboth support group for gay families, but suddenly it just felt right to me. This community, and by that I mean all who claim this place as a part of their lives no matter where they live, is an extraordinary one. We are family—and the love and support we share with one another is amazing.

Belonging to a tribe or a clan, used to be essential to survival, and though that’s no longer quite the case, we have still evolved to want to be a part of a group—to need support and love from family, from friends, from our church or other organizations to which we belong. 

As we reach out to those in our community who are not yet members of CAMP Rehoboth, I’m reminded that like our ancient ancestors, we too still need our tribe for survival—and I believe our tribe, still needs CAMP Rehoboth and that we have much to offer. We provide a physical center, a place we can all call home. We are an advocate for the LGBT community in our town and our state, and while the work we do with Equality Delaware and throughout the state captures headlines, it is often in the tiny encounters, the one-on-one conversations, counseling, and meetings that no one sees, where our most important work is accomplished. From Women’s FEST to Sundance and the CAMP Chorus, CAMP Rehoboth builds a sense of community through its events and activities. From CAMP-Mautner Cares to CAMPsafe, our HIV Education and Prevention Program, we are involved in the health and wellness of our community. 

Supporting the organizations that support us is crucial to maintaining a healthy community. It is a symbiotic relationship that provides help for those who need it, and resources in time, energy, and money from those who have the means to give them. 

To participate in the activities and programs of CAMP Rehoboth doesn’t require membership in the organization. It never has. Our goal has always been to create a more positive world that welcomes everyone. Becoming a member does provide, at certain levels, discounts to events and coffee mugs, among other things, but the real benefit, I believe, is in knowing that my membership really makes a difference to CAMP Rehoboth and to the work we do in our community.

No one will ever convince me that anyone really likes to ask for money, but that’s the nature of non-profit organizations. Our success depends on the generosity of others, and we always have to ask. As with everything I do in regards to CAMP Rehoboth, I don’t ask of anyone anything that I’m not willing to do myself. Steve and I are members at the highest level we can afford. Please consider becoming a member of CAMP Rehoboth, or of renewing or upgrading an existing membership.

Every year, I am dazzled by the generosity of those of you who are a part of the CAMP family, and I witness the boundless enthusiasm and dedication of our volunteers and members—who are, quite often one and the same. You inspire me to keep going even on the hard days. You are my tribe, my clan, and yes, my family. Thank you for your support in whatever form it takes!

Murray Archibald, CAMP Co-founder and President of the Board of Directors of CAMP Rehoboth, is an artist in Rehoboth Beach. To become a member of CAMP Rehoboth visit the online CAMP Rehoboth store.