Remember how you felt when you had your first crush, when you couldnt eat or sleep because all your thoughts were focused on that wonderful person? Do you also remember how devastating it was when, deciding to express those feelings, you were told you werent "natural", that something was wrong with you? Then, having to live a lie just to be accepted by your family and friends? Worst of all, do you remember feeling that there was no one else on earth feeling the same things that you were?
That continues to be the experience for many gay and lesbian youth, even in todays more progressive society. Despite advances in the acceptance of differing sexual orientations, many people remain uncomfortable dealing with younger people and their sexuality. Unfortunately, these feelings of being "abnormal" and the lack of supportive people in their lives lead to the sad fact that gay and lesbian youth are FOUR times more likely to attempt suicide than their straight peers.
Hoping to support these at-risk youth, Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) Sussex County at Rehoboth started a youth group last spring. Now meeting every Sunday afternoon, from 2-4 PM at Epworth United Methodist Church in Rehoboth, the group provides a safe place for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and straight persons under the age of 25 to hang out, spend time together, talk with each other, and to have fun! While the focus is on the younger members, there are always adults on hand to act as resources and role models. Since the initial meetings in April, a core assembly of faithful attendees has developed, with varied "drop-ins" from week to week. The gathering has grown to include not only the g/l/b/t youth but also "straight allies," heterosexual kids who are accepting of their gay and lesbian friends.
The PFLAG youth group appears to be meeting many of the needs in the lives of these young people. "You cant always be yourself," said one 16 year-old male who attends every week. "You get run out of school. You lose friends when you tell them that youre gay. The youth group is a good way to meet others like me, in a safe environment. You can talk about problems if you need to, and no one judges you." Those feelings are echoed by a 15 year-old female that comes to the meetings. "Being able to talk to others in the same position as myself gives me a sense of belonging, when you can talk about problems that others share." These problems often center around family and school. Some young people report ongoing harassment in their schools, episodes of vandalism against their property at school and at home (including one whose house has been "egged" after others discovered he was gay), and varying levels of disapproval from their family members. For these kids, the PFLAG youth group is a haven of peace in a world full of harsh judgments and criticisms.
One of the primary missions of PFLAG Sussex County at Rehoboth is to offer a loving community to g/l/b/t persons and their families through support in coping with an adverse society, education to enlighten an ill-informed public, and advocacy to end discrimination and to secure equal rights. The youth group is a cornerstone of that missions foundation. For more information about these meetings, call the PFLAG Helpline at (302) 856-3389 or drop by some Sunday afternoon. Be prepared, however; these young men and women have as much to teach the adults as we have ideas to guide them! They are truly shining examples of pride, intelligence and energy within the gay community.
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11/21/97 Issue. Copyright 1997 by CAMP Rehoboth, Inc. All rights reserved.