Most men I know have a bottle or two of massage oil and lube in their night stand. But only a relative few have a more exotic treasure trove of sexual lubricants, massage oils and warming oilsand there's really no reason for it. You guys do not know what you are missing! Sexual lubricants are a fun and frisky way to ready the body and senses for sexual play.
Lubricants have been used for centuries to smooth the way. Oftentimes our bodies won't produce enough moisture to allow for comfortable sex. That's where lube comes in. Lot's of lube! A handful will make the whole experience safer and more enjoyable for both partners.
Sexual lubricants
Sexual lubricants come in four basic forms:
Petroleum-based. Made from petroleum jelly, mineral oil or petrolatum. Different types include Vaseline products, and baby oil. Petroleum-based lubes destroy latexpractically on contact. Never use with condoms. Petroleum-based lubes stain fabric and can be difficult to wash out. Again, they should not be used with condoms.
Oil-based. Usually made from natural products, such as vegetable oils, nut oils, Crisco and butter. Oil-based lubes tend to stain fabrics and can be difficult to wash off. Oil-based lubes also destroy latex, so, like petroleum-based lubes, they should never be used with condoms.
Water-based. Water-based lubricants typically contain de-ionized water, glycerin, propylene glycol and nontoxic preservatives. Available in both flavored and unflavored mixturesalthough most unflavored lubes taste slightly sweet. Water-based lubes do not stain, are safe for use with latex and rarely cause irritation. While they often dry out during extended sex, water-based lubes are quickly revived with a spritz of water or a dollop of saliva. Water-based lubes are the form of lube recommended most often by sex therapists and experienced couples. Water-based lubes are available from specialty shops, catalogs and online retailers.
Silicone-based. Silicone-based lubricants are similar to water-based lubes with one notable difference: because they are silicone based, they are completely waterproof, making them ideal for underwater use. They retain their lubricating properties longer than water-based lubricants, and they are highly concentrated, so a little goes a long way. Silicone will not harm latex, as oil-based lubricants will do; however, silicone-based lubricants can harm sex toys made from silicone.
Whether you decide to try petroleum, oil, water or silicone based lubricants, remember the various restrictions that go along with each. Try a sampler pack of assorted lubricants. If you don't find a lube you like right away, don't panic: there are about a zillion different kinds out there. To get you started, here are my favorite kinds.
Astroglide. A longtime favorite, water-based and water-soluble Astroglide is designed to mimic the body's natural fluids. Astroglide enhances sexual pleasure and makes condom use more enjoyable. Invented by a rocket scientist!
Slippery Stuff. Originally developed as a way to more easily slip into rubber diving suits, Slippery Stuff soon became a popular sexual lubricant once users realized that water revives the lube's slippery quality. Slick, odorless and completely taste-free, this water-soluble lube is great for underwater sex.
Eros Bodyglide Classic. A super-concentrated silicone-based sexual lubricant, Eros doubles as a moisturizer and therapeutic massage lotion. The silicone formula makes it perfect for underwater use. Never sticky or tacky, the lubricant is hypoallergenic and safe for use with condoms.
Elbow Grease. This legendary petroleum-based lube is thick and creamy, making it ideal for genital massage, masturbation, anal play or marathon lovemaking. Non-sticky and long-lasting, we particularly recommend it for anal use. Not for use with latex products. Available in regular or "hot" menthol.
ID Juicy Lube. Available in four different flavors, this slick, long-lasting water-based lube is tasty, if a little sweet.
Massage Oils
Massage oils or lotions do a variety of useful things: they spice up a boring night, lend a sensual dimension to a boring old back rub, and (most importantly) reduce friction, keeping your back silky and slippery while your lover massages it. Without massage oil, a sensual massage can quickly turn into a sandpapery rubdown. Pour a small amount in the palm of your hand and rub your hands together before gently applying to your lover's body. Never pour oil directly on their backit's cold and just a little bit scary.
While you can use regular hand lotion, it's best to use lotions or oils specifically developed for massage. They leave less of a sticky residue and often have a pleasant aroma and/or taste. If you have oily skin, make sure you shower afterwards; massage oils may cause skin breakouts. Try to avoid the Ben-Gay scented athletic tonics when combining sex with massagethe mentholated fumes can be a huge sensual turnoff. Remember, massage oils are intended for external use only.
Kama Sutra Aromatic Massage Oils. Relax, rejuvenate or arouse your lover with the intoxicating aromas from this popular oil collection. Blended with almond, grape seed and other pure essential oils, these five light, non-greasy blends glide on easily to minimize friction. Not safe for use with latex products.
Warming Oils. Also known as edible oils, warming oils work almost the same way massage oils work: pour a small puddle in one hand, rub both hands together to distribute, then apply in a thin layer to the desired area, and gently rub into the skin. As you continue to massage, the warming oil will begin to heat up, causing your partner to feel a pleasantly warm sensation. While not the best option for full-body massages, warming oils are great for genital massage, or small, concentrated areas.
Some warming oils can't be used with latex productsmake sure to read the label before using. Warming oils aren't appropriate for internal usedon't use them for anal penetration. I speak from experienceit burns like hell and can do damage. Be warned: it may irritate skin.
Kama Sutra Oils of Love. The Rolls-Royce of warming oils, Kama Sutra Oils of Love are an elegant addition to any sexual interaction. Slippery, glycerin-based, stain-free and condom-compatible. Made with natural Indian fragrances and in assorted flavors.
Summer's Heat Warming Oil. The trailer-park cousin of Kama Sutra Oils, they get the job done: rub them on and lick them offthe more you rub, the hotter they get.
Hot Licks Warming Lotion. Made with edible vegetable glycerin and pure food flavors, this lickable warming lotion is perfect for a romantic weekend at a trashy hotel. Available in several flavors.
Intimacy Warm Embrace. A smooth and silky lotion, great for sensual massage. It stays slippery, and the warmth factor isn't too overpowering. The skin heats up during regular massage, but blowing and licking will heat things up even more. Excellent tastenot too sweet. Available in six flavors.
Salvatore Seeley, the CAMPsafe Program Director and official lube tester, may be reached at 302-227-5620.
LETTERS From CAMP Rehoboth, Vol. 11, No. 2, Mar. 9, 2001.